Raising Mom: Conscious Parenting
Parenting, like anything, is a journey. One day you think you have it all figured out, then a new dynamic comes into the mix.
When we plan on expanding and procreating, the reasons we have are usually selfish in nature. A need to ‘complete’ yourself or your family is the main reason. What we do not realise is that children actually raise us more then we raise them. They help us raise our level of consciousness, if we are awake enough to notice this.
The decision to become a parent is not a one to be taken lightly. You have an opportunity to shape and positively influence another’s soul journey and learn lessons and grow together!
Children in their very nature do not know what limitations are. All they know is to expand and grow. As parents, we project our own belief system onto them, and due to our own limitations, we pass down the torch of a generational pattern that they then carry forward.
Competition: When we have kids, immediately competition sets in. We measure our children’s milestones from the moment they are born and talk to other parents about it and compare them. Parents boast about their child’s achievements, which feeds their own egos. It carries on into school years where children are rated based on their marks, how much better they did than others, sports achievements, the way they look, how ‘good’ or ‘bad their behavior is.
Now I am not saying that they should not be taught and not play sport, but too much emphasis is put on how well they have done in comparison to others. This is the start of their self-image and self-worth. Teaching our children to have fun and enjoy the process and the journey of getting somewhere is way more important than whether they came first or not. As humans, we can still WIN without everything being a competition. Celebrate your child’s small wins as an individual, without focusing on what other kids are doing.
Our children challenge us every single day and the more they challenge us, the more we need to expand ourselves and grow. They trigger the very things within us that need to be brought into our consciousness in order to evolve spiritually.
We automatically want the best for our children and avoid the perceived ‘negative’ stuff from happening. We are all human and have our off days. I am far from a perfect parent, but I have accepted myself and the perfect mother for my son. We have an absolutely amazing relationship, however, we are both stubborn and strong willed. He triggers my areas of development and instead of reacting, if I step back and look within as to why I am reacting, I can start to take steps to become MORE conscious and work WITH my son, instead of feeling like we are working against each other.
I am 100% open and honest with him and do not hide anything from him. Although he is only 6, he is way beyond his years and just gets things. If I react, I apologise. I want him to know that I love him unconditionally and no matter what he has or hasn’t done, he is worthy of love.
Some of the lessons I have learnt myself, while teaching them to my son:
It is ok to mess up, as long as we learn from the stuff-up and move past it.
If you need to cry, cry! Do not suppress it. (I never tell my son not to cry)
Don’t be scared to express yourself, ever.
You will not get on with everyone all the time, and it is ok if some people don’t like you. This does not change who you are and your worth.
You are in competition with no-one. Do your best and have fun regardless of what is going on around you.
Laugh every day.
Quiet time is important.
Be grateful for something every day, no matter how simple or small it is.
Accept yourself for who you are, not for who you are not.
Don’t sweat the small stuff – I know this is a cliché, but you really learn this on a deeper level when you have children
Do something good for someone else, without any expectation of reward or recognition.
Be mindful and aware of everyone around you. Treat them with respect and compassion.
Recommended Reading:
I am busy reading a book called “The Conscious Parent: Transforming ourselves, empowering our childre
n” by Shefali Tsabary. I would highly recommend it to every single parent and parent-to-be, in fact, anyone and everyone as it makes us so much more aware of relationships and the role they play in our spiritual evolution.
Bronwyn Petzer
Bronwyn is a 38 year-old divorced mother of a 6 year old son who is originally from Port Elizabeth. For years she searched for her purpose and the true meaning of life. Questioning everything and not settling for the average, she did not give up the quest for knowing more and becoming more.
She was diagnosed with Depression at the age of 16 and Generalised Anxiety Disorder at the age of 21 and was medicated for both. After years of being on medication she could feel the long term effects it was doing to her and started seeking a way to get off the meds. She was also bulimic and hated herself for it.
After years of failed attempts to get off the meds, suicidal thoughts and many doctors and specialists later, she found the healing modality Applied Kinesiology. She was not sure it would work but she was desperate and at the point where she would try anything.
With the help of the Kinesiology and a holistic approach to her health, she took her last tablet on 1 December 2013 after three years of weaning off.
During that time she decided to take a course on Applied Kinesiology with the doctor she had been consulting with. She did it in order to help herself and her family. Afterwards she realized just how powerful this modality was and that it was her duty and purpose to help others on their healing journey.
She is 100% confident in and passionate about this amazing modality and she wants to educate people and show them that there is hope.
She is also a blogger and has written articles for online publications and websites.
She believes wholeheartedly that through her own health challenges, she can inspire others to believe and take action in order to reach their full potential and live a happy, healthy and fulfilled life.